i did it again. i fell for it.
i'm so bummed out right now and i'm sure it has to do with running off of 3 hours sleep, but i'm still really bummed. and i know i shouldn't care... but i do. i care a lot.
i really thought it would work out different... but i guess deep down i had a feeling he'd pull the same shit as last time. why though? i REALLY don't get it... where is the thrill in it, what does he get out of it???? seriously, though... what does he get out of it? i'm okay if he changed his mind or he wasn't in the mood... whatever, just tell me. fuck, i'm understanding. its just the playing me like hes all stoked to hang out and then.... nothing... i know i shouldn't care this much... i shouldn't at all... it doesn't matter, right?? but i swear, i need closure or something... cause i have such strong feelings for him. i wish i could just forget him... i wish i didn't fuck up so badly. i dont know what to do. maybe he senses my feelings? but honestly, i dont want to date him... i just want to have closure and i feel like if we hang out it might bring that to me. it just ended so weird... i'm so stupid. whats the matter with me?
i need sleep.
maybe i'll get over it tomorrow. my stomach is in my throat right now.
whats wrong with me?
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Sometimes I wish I were a kid again; skinned knees are a lot easier to fix than a broken heart
1 comment:
nothing is wrong with you, you are perfect, and if he(whoever he may be) is lame, then there's a far better man out there for you. seriously, you live in LA, how can you not be constantly bumping into hot male celebrities all the time? (hahaha, ok sorry for the sarcasm) but honestly, you're awesome, and you deserve a real man.
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